I DON'T KNOW WHERE DAMION GOT THE IDEA to put a bunch of Storm Troopers on road bikes.

But it's really funny.

And, that's why he'll never be sued by George Lucas or Disney or whoever Darth Vader answers to these days.

It's parody law.

But we didn't know jack about that when we had our first t-shirt hit: Strava Made Me Dope.  So, when those nerds sent us a nasty letter we pooped our pants and nearly quit the business all together.

All we knew was we liked bike culture and that Damion could design and I could print.  

It makes me wonder how many businesses have been started on a bike ride?

For sure, the vast majority have nothing to do with riding bikes other than the founders enjoy bike riding.

That's the cool part, right?  Go for a ride, and you really get to know people.  It just happens naturally.

I asked Damion if we could get a deal... 'cause why not?  

So here's the deal... buy 2 shirts, get 3.  

Use promo code DHDwear

https://pedalindustries.com/collections/dhdwear

The code DHDwear actually saves you 33%, so you could use it on as many shirts as you want.

There are more designs here:  

https://pedalindustries.com/collections/dhdwear

_____

I DON'T ALWAYS GO TO THE GYM, but when I do I prefer the home gym.

My gym workout takes 20-30 minutes, depending on how much time I want to spend.

It's pretty simple, and pays dividends.

How do I know?... well, I don't.. except I was voted Mr. Universe just before waking up this morning.

Note: never take workout advice from cyclist, no matter how sincere.

Other than my daily pull ups and push ups, 2-3 times a week I use the equipment above + my pull up bar and my stairs.

I do curls and shoulder presses on the Bosu ball.

Squats and lunges with the kettle bell.

Bent row with the 52.5 lb dumbbell.

Burpees with the 15pounders... but not just any burpee, I do a row on each side then shoulder press when I stand.

Some leg opening and closing with the Pilates ring.

Throw in some core work.

Plus the stairs... I do a number of sets, jumping 3 at a time... to get to the pull up bar and start all over again.

I've tried going to the gym... and I always end up quitting.  This, this I've been able to be consistent with... it's quick and convenient.

With all the scientific training I don't have, based on hearsay and whatnot, I can tell you this... it doesn't suck to feel stronger.

Strong like bull?

Yeah!

Strong enough to wear hi-viz pink socks that ship for free and are made right here in the United States of American by Americans who love what they do and are damn proud of their work when they go home at the end of the day?

That strong?

Heck yeah!

https://pedalindustries.com/products/hi-viz-sublimated-sock

_____

BRETT HORTON TAUGHT ME TO SPRINT.  He claimed he was a badass with San Jose Bicycle Club... and swore he was Specialized's first factory rider, on track bike serial number 1.

All true.

But, all I knew was I wanted to get a helluvalot faster.

And since he knew how to score with the ladies, he probably knew how to win on bikes.

Whether or not he taught me how to sprint I'll leave up to you... but this is indisputable:

Brett learned how to score cycling memorabilia, the very best, and built one of the world's largest collections.

His personal connections allow him to acquire the unobtainable.

For instance, Friday he's going to sit down with Bernard Hinault, the Badger... the freaking BADGER!...

... to sign 297 lithos (99 of 3 different images)...

... with personal inscriptions... 

Want to impress the heck outta your cycling father-law?  Blow away your big customer?  Put the bow on your man cave?

Go here: 

https://pedalindustries.com/collections/horton-collection/products/bernard-hinault-attack-of-the-badger-personally-inscribed-limited-edition-of-99

Don't delay... orders must be in by 6pm Thursday.

I talked to him this afternoon.  He's in France, going to 6 day races before Friday's signing with Hinault... and he's pretty darn confident this will sell out.

I'll cover the US shipping on this... ping me if you are out of country.

https://pedalindustries.com/collections/horton-collection/products/bernard-hinault-attack-of-the-badger-personally-inscribed-limited-edition-of-99

_____

THE TITLE SAYS IT ALL, not if... but what the internet is doing to our brains.

 The quote that impacted me most:  "We shape our tools and thereafter they shape us."

Therein lies the potential beauty of our two-wheeled antidote.  

I refuse to hook up my phone to my bike computer.

I do not listen to music or podcasts while riding.

My phone is on, so I may snap a quick pic.  That's it.  On, but on airplane mode.

I ride to escape, to free myself of the net.  

To hear my heart and feel my thoughts.

To smell the sky and taste life's entire analog spectrum.

To see freedom.

The bike is my tool, my counter measure to distraction and sloth.

May my mind rest and my blood flow fast, forever

-----

When the seductive call of the net beckons... politely decline, Gotta Ride

https://pedalindustries.com/products/gotta-ride-t-shirt

 _____

THE MEATHEAD ELBOWED HIS WAY TO THE FRONT OF THE LINE.

He gloated to his companion... Did you see how I got us right up front?  then loudspeaking I hope we make our train.

I patiently waited to place my order, standing on cleats to peer over his enormous ego.

Yes, I'll take a coffeecake muffin please.

I settled into "my" preferred chair in the back and elbowed the aforementioned negativity...

... preferring to review the thus far glorious morning which I'd spent riding with some of the county's best riders.

The pace had been steamy in a locomotive sorta way, and unlike 2 weeks ago I was able to hang on...

... the difference? 

Heck, I dunno.  Well, I do know I got a solid 8 hrs and lathered up with PR Lotion.  

Elbows... yes, elbows!

Elbows were flying as our choo-choo of 30 railed through town.

The flick kind.  You know.  Where you do your turn, slide over and flick the elbow.

Early elbow flicking is gentlemanly thing, lady-like too.  Kind of a Yoohoo, c'mon through, I could pull more but I know you want a workout too.

By the time we got back to the coast, things were serious.  5 rolling miles up the road was the sprint.

Late elbow flicking is generally humiliating... more of a Crap, I'm cooked, pleasepleaseplease come around for I fear I might die should you delay.

There was a lot late elbow flicking going on.  Gasps turning to gaps.  I love that kinda effort, right on the edge of blowing up...

... the final bite of my muffin was a good as the first.  I reveled in my amazingly good fortune and with no rush to be home rode some more.

On third thought, I did wear this hat all week... does subliminal advertising get the credit?

https://pedalindustries.com/products/ride-fast-curved-bill?variant=10683321516068

 _____

YOU SHOULD NOT RIDE YOUR BIKE TO WORK, if...

1. You want to save money.  

2. You want to get in shape. 

3. You want to help the environment.

4. You will use it as an excuse to get a "gravel" bike.

5. You want to skip the insanity of traffic.

6. You want to increase your cognitive skills. 

The only reason to bike to work is it's a helluva a lot more fun!

My buddy Seth has been bloggin' about getting rid of his car for about 45 days.  Following his conversion reminded me of the other years I've been a bike commuter.

Today marked my return.

It was awesome.

Got there in 10 minutes - I live close... but apparently 50% of US lives within 5 miles of work, so there.

Peeled off my gear.

Wiped down my special purpose area with hand sanitizer - TMI?  Followed by some de-ode.

Stepped into my jeans, tshirt and flip flops and got down to business.

At lunch, I took a lovely and dirty 1 hour route home.

Drove back, 'cause need the van for shipping.

All in a days work.

Should you be so inspired you can get the stylish and powerful Knog bell and lights throughout thee weekend at 25% savings using code COMINGTHRU.

Order here: 

https://pedalindustries.com/pages/pedal-posse-proven

Be sure to use the code COMINGTHRU to save 25% through the weekend.

 _____

I DUMPED A LOAD OF GEARS, STOMPED ON THE PEDALS, CHAIN SKIPPED, KNEE SMASHED INTO STEM.  As the blood filled the deep impression just to the side of my kneecap, it occurred to me:  

This is hard...
and I love it!

That's the difference between us and them. 

If it's easy, we pass.  
If anybody can do it, we skip it.

We're down for the hard stuff, the demanding stuff and the stuff that scares the crap out of us:

Shooting gaps while sprinting
Launching off drops into rut-lined trails
Committing to 200 mile races
Lining up with A's knowing a pistol whipping will ensue
These are the things we do...

We aren't into easy...

We're into growing, challenging, learning... we know that hard things make us better.

We're breaking through the barriers... and we're letting people know with these awesome bells from Knog.

https://pedalindustries.com/products/knog-oi-bike-bell

Which you can order through the weekend at 25% savings using code COMINGTHRU.

 _____

Rest Day
Ride with us: click for info.

GOT A LATE START.

It was supposed to be a lunch ride.

Threw on the lights.

Rode into the night.

Not lonely.

Not cold.

Plenty of rabbits.

Couple of giant owls.

Camo socks were perfect... 'cause I was battling an of day demon.

If you're new to our socks, I don't want you to hesitate.  Use promo code TRYSOCKS to save 20%.  You regulars, you already know... so you use the code just for being awesome.

https://pedalindustries.com/products/camo-sock-sublimated

TRYSOCKS code will expire in 48 hours and is limited to the first 50 orders... yes, of course you can share this code and yes it works on all our socks.

_____

166.4 lbs 
Gym Work
7.5 hrs sleep 
https://www.strava.com/activities/2863478310

Ride with us: click for info. 

WE HIT THE BOTTOM OF THE WALL 40 RIDERS STRONG.

I was 10 guys back.

Then 5.

With 100 meters to go, at the steepest point, I was 2nd wheel ... 

Hot damn!  I must be riding really good today.

At the apex I peeked back, expecting to see the usual handful.

Instead, I saw all 40 glued to my wheel.

Through misty breath gasps it was easy to note they weren't even working.

Then it hit me.

Earlier in the ride, they'd been a little frisky at the regroup... leaving the stragglers behind (I'd know). 

Being the mother hen, I took it upon myself to make very, very clear that's not the way we ride this time of year.

Yes, while I was "proudly" summitting... they timidly followed their elder.

How could I be so mean?

I feel just awful.

The only way I can make it up to 'em is by offering this amazing light for a smoking deal... 

https://pedalindustries.com/products/knog-cobber-wrap-around-bike-light

I won't remind them how I feel about their many weak and worthless taillights...
I've caused enough trauma for the day...
Who the heck lets The Old Diesel beat 'em on the climb?  Poor little chickies.

Use code BADDIESEL to save 25% if you want to take advantage of me in an emotionally vulnerable moment.

It's good on all the KNOG products for the rest of the week - Note, these ship FREE about a week after order is placed.

https://pedalindustries.com/products/knog-cobber-wrap-around-bike-light

_____

166.2 lbs 
0 pull ups/0 push ups
7 hrs sleep 
https://www.strava.com/activities/2860061705

Ride with us: click for info. 

I RECKON FEW OF MY NEIGHBORS KNOW THE CITY LIKE I DO, and why would they?

Belted in, they zoom from place to place.

But not me... and not you.

We wander.

Last week I found a beautiful memorial.

Placed forlornly at the dead end of a long, hard to find street, the irony was heavy. 

I stopped for a personal moment of silence.

I JUST FINISHED READING WHY WE SLEEP.  Mike said I'd be an evangelist for the book's message, and boy was he right.

Check out what happens when we get less than 8 hours of sleep:

Time to physical exhaustion drops by 10-30%
Aerobic output is significantly reduced
Faster rates of lactic acid build up
Reductions in blood oxygen saturation
Impairment of the body to cool itself through sweating
Weight gain through loss of hunger control
100% increase in risk of injury

... and that's just the athletic stuff, there's a whole bunch more... but, who cares about a complete and well rounded life?

Personally, I think the main thing I need to do is start my shut down sequence earlier... you know, the binge watching stretching session. 

I say that because I'm a morning person (that's a real thing) and it's hard for me to sleep in.

I'm gonna get up.

To ride or get to workin'

I need every edge I can get, and sleep is free!

I'd like to write a log more, but I gotta hit the hay.

Quick word... if you're jet lagged or over 50ish, melatonin is a great at kicking our brains into gotosleep mode.

My goto product is RĒKÜVR NITE TIME™.  You can get it here: 

https://pedalindustries.com/products/rekuvr-nite-time%E2%84%A2

Nite-nite.

Oooops... almost forgot, use this code Nov 11 & 12 to save 20% -> REKUVER20

_____

166.2 lbs 
0 pull ups/0 push ups
8 hrs sleep 
2 mile walk on beach

Ride with us: click for info. 

IT'S INCONCEIVABLE.  How is it possible that I'm setting PRs as I age?

Not the climbing kind.

Or, TT kind.

The ripping the lugs off your sidewalls kind shredding a long descent...

... I wasn't really going for it because my riding buddy (gotta protect the innocent here) was off the back.  

I just felt really good and very planted.

So, here's what I think is happening.

1.  I have a very, very fast bike.  Scott Spark.  Roval wheels with ceramic bearings.  Maxxis 2.2 Ikon up front, Maxxis 2.35 Aspen on the rear.  25lbs in each.

2. I'm strong.  For the past year I've been very dedicated to my weight training and core work and stretching.  Generally, I hate doing it but always feel awesome when it's over.  

3.  This is gonna sound weird, but it's true... I can see better.  When I first came back to my MTB roots my eyes would scramble over rough terrain.  Like they were loose, rattling around.  Everything would go fuzzy at speed.  But, by riding a lot of MTB they have steadily gotten stronger to the point that my vision is stabilized. Weird, right?

Now, if you're really hauling @$$ like I am, you've got to have a great connection to your bike.  Which is why I've worked so hard on these gloves.

https://pedalindustries.com/pages/gloves

The leather palms are super thin and perforated.   The top is perforated polyester... you can see your skin.  They are super light.

I may be sweating like craycray, but I neverever slip and my hands are always cool.

They come in lots of colors, and yes we'll make 'em to match your team gear.

Check 'em out. 

https://pedalindustries.com/pages/gloves

_____

165 lbs 
0 pull ups/0 push ups
6 hrs sleep - not enough
4 hour epic MTB

Ride with us: click for info. 

I'D FINALLY DID IT.  Committed that from today forward, every Friday would feature a lunch ride.  Not a beat down, but an upbeat friendly sorta thing.

I geared up.

Took a meandering dirt and street route over to Kawamata Sea Food.

The weather couldn't have been better.

Just me for the first go.  Mainly to prove to myself I could and would quit working for a bit at Noon vs my usual 2pm.

I was quite proud, thinking this is great.  It's mid-day and I'm out riding.  This route is cool.  The posse is gonna dig it.  And oh man I can't wait for a delicious poke bowl.

About half the seats outside were open.

Leaned HVY MTL (my gravel bike) by a table for two and jettisoned helmet, glasses and gloves.

Walked in, ordered... and the horror... Cash only, bro.

I'd forgotten my RaceDay wallet.

-> insert sad trumpets here <-

Dejected.  I did the walk of shame to my bike.

Not all is lost.  I proved to myself I can make the schedule work, and really that's all I needed for a win.

At least I didn't forget my commitment.

Probably because I was wearing this ridiculously soft, 100% t-shirt.

It's an athletic cut, not a boxy thang.  You're an athlete, right?

There's a bunch more I could tell ya... but just get it.  You'll freakin' lub it.

https://pedalindustries.com/products/ride-your-bike-t-shirt

_____

164.6 lbs 
Gym Work
6.5 hrs sleep - not enough
60 min ride

Ride with us: click for info. 

IF YOU'VE RIDDEN WITH ME LATELY, then you may have noticed I'm always maneuvering to be on your right side.  

The only thing I fear about riding in the gutter is nothing... I'm perfectly comfy pegged to the curb.

But, my reason for doing is sheer Dudedumbness...

.. . that thing when you're a dude and you're hurting and you don't go to the doctor until it's unbearable.  In my particular case, I couldn't hear shyte outta my right ear.

Mr Todd, what brings you in?

Huh?

WHY.  ARE.  YOU.  HERE?

'CAUSE.  I.  CAN'T.  HEAR.  SHYTE.  OUTTA.  MY.  RIGHT.  EAR.

My doc is savvy.  He's seen my type.  Moved to my left side.

Why are you here?

I'm tired of fighting to ride in the gutter, Doc.

Hmmmm... well, there's a lot of that going around.

Really?

20 minutes later, I'm good as new.  Ready to ride, either side.

Am I cured of Dudedumbness? 

You'd think so.

Then again, if you're a gutter surfer like me with cat like reflexes and all... you actually start to believe in that whole nine lives thing, which leads to puttin' the doc off for one more day, which leads to not hearing shyte.

Which reminds me... did you hear about our BUY ONE GET ONE FREE deal on my most favoritist tires, Continental GP5000s?

Use this code CONTIBOGO to get 50% savings when you buy 2 Conti GP5000 tires w/Conti tubes (It actually works on 2 or more, but you didn't hear that from moi).

There's a catch... our group order goes in Friday 11/8/19, end of day.  Then, it will ship to the Interplanetary HQ where we will repack and ship to you on Thursday.

Here's the link: 

https://pedalindustries.com/pages/pedal-posse-proven

_____

163.6 lbs 
0 pull ups/0 pushups
7 hrs sleep w/cat nap

Ride with us: click for info. 

MY LIFE ACCORDING TO STRAVA vs MY LIFE ACCORDING TO ME

28 days active -> 31 days of living life

666mi -> a devilish number for a saint like me

53h 4m-> hours of inexpressible joy, mingled with pain

48,786ft -> every summit followed by a ripping descent

2658 kudos received -> nothing compared to a call from a loved one

New PRs 103 ->  I can't remember one that mattered

It sure is swell of ol' Strava to take out the abacus and do all these calculations because it puts it all in perspective...

I'm a helluva lucky guy.

But, the luck doesn't stop here...

Check this out -> Conti was so impressed with the PEDALposse's Strava numbers they gave us a BUY ONE GET ONE deal on my most favoritist tires.

Use this code CONTIBOGO to get 50% savings when you buy 2 tires w/tubes (It actually works on 2 or more, but you didn't hear that from moi).

There's a catch... our group order goes in Friday 11/8/19, end of day.  Then, it will ship to the Interplanetary HQ where we will repack and ship to you on Thursday.

Here's the link: 

https://pedalindustries.com/pages/pedal-posse-proven

_____

165.4 lbs 
Gym Work
7 hrs sleep

Ride with us: click for info. 

GETTING ALL GEEKED UP FOR THE MORNING SOCIAL RIDE, er ripyourlegsoff ride, I was sure to set my alarm clock.

Darn sure.

Set 3 of 'em.

Just to be sure.

'Cause gotta be rolling by 5:43AM.

So... when I rolled over and cracked my eyes to a brightening sky there was a brief What the?!

Popped up, blacked out.

Dang!

Dang!

Dang!

Hopping around... PJs flying... bibs on backwards... then frontwards... socks on... vest, beanie...

Grab the pre-made bottles, load the pocket with waffles.

Pump tires.

Lights, computer already on bike.

The only reason I made it 0 seconds to spare is because I laid everything out the night before.  

Know thyself, bro!

So, here's the cuckoo offer (because I'm pulling for YOU to be strong!):  buy 2 of these shirts, give one to your chubby checker, and commit to eat less and ride more the next 2 months.  Use promo code EATLESSRIDEMORE for 50% savings.

https://pedalindustries.com/products/eat-less-ride-more-t-shirt

_____

166.2 lbs (i think i'll wear that t everyday this month)
20 pull ups/60 pushups
7 hrs sleep
3.25

Ride with us: click for info. 

WHEN JEFF WAS A SUPER-COOL SENIOR 3 and I was a super-lame Senior 4 (these were the olden days before Categories and 5s), I could only look on in shy, humiliating admiration.

When he saw my calf he shook his head and said...

Clean off that Senior 4.

Huh?

That grease tattoo down there.

That's Jeff.  Always teaching.

These days, between racing and adventures, he dominates the wire bending scene in Park City.

He uses his stories of racing The Crusher and riding the cobbles of Belgium to inspire his tribe to get quickly across the finish line with a beautiful smile.

With the biz justifiably picking up the tab.

-> Never, ever take advice financial from a cyclist <-

You can do the same thing and here's a great place to start:  

https://pedalindustries.com/pages/start-a-project

Our minimum order is 1 item.  One. Uno. As in a single product.

Don't own a biz?... run it past your marketing department, they're always looking for ways to promote.  Or, maybe start a side hustle.

As long as we're talking about your wallet, here's a nifty favorite of mine.  Made from inner tube, it's svelte and secure and stays put in your jersey pocket.

This one will remind you to ride your bike, and be a great conversation piece to tell your businesses story.

https://pedalindustries.com/products/ride-your-bike-raceday-tm-wallet

_____

166 lbs
gym work
8 hrs sleep
1 hr ride

Ride with us: click for info. 

PETER SAGAN HAS A NEW TEAMMATE, it's California legend T.O.D.

When asked by GCN why he had to have the aging racer on the team Peto was quick to respond...

Why not?  He's fast for his age.  He's claimed numerous KOMs in his weight class.  And, he's a hell of a lot of fun to be around.

Pressed on why those were winning qualities team owner Ralph Denk was very frank...

Look, we don't count on him winning anything but we just like him.  He works hard, sweats a lot, and eats pretty good most of the time.  We think he'll be a huge inspiration to the younger guys on the team.

GCN cornered The Old Diesel.  just after he was the last guy to come off the winning break of the local group ride.  They probed how he felt about taking a spot away on the team from someone who might actually help the champion win a race.

I know, it's sounds crazy.  But, I've been a huge fan of Sagan's since lining up to race him at Over The Hump.  When he lapped me that day I knew being teammates was our destiny.  Of course my wife will miss me, but she has a good TV and she'll be able to see me doing my thing.  My kids are excited to, after years of living like a pro I'll finally be one.  My neighbors are already asking for my autograph. And my mom, bless her heart, cried.  I can't wait for the first training camp, to hang out with the guys and...

Dad... Dad... DAD! Are you listening to me?

What, huh, yeah, of course honey...

Reading The Secret Life of Walter MIddy today reminded me of the life saving balm a good day dream can be.  Times when we drift off and dream of what it would feel like to be pro.  To ride all day, climbing the highest mountains, professional chefs looking out for us... ah, the life of a professional bike racer.  What it would it be like?

Maybe you dream of wearing the stars and stripes, of being a national champion, of representing the USA.  If that's you, our Patriot Speed Jersey could be just what you're looking for.

We make them to order, right here in 'Merica.

Check it out:  

https://pedalindustries.com/products/made-in-usa-speed-jersey-ships-in-about-3-weeks

Yes, the actual short story is better than mine... a lot better.

_____

165.2 lbs
0 pullups/0 pushups
8 hrs sleep
3 mile walk on sand

Ride with us: click for info. 

SURFERGIRL SPLIT FOR HIGHER PASTURES YESTERDEE.  I looked at her long-faced, swore I didn't know what I'd do with myself...

... then started planning today's ride...

'cause ain't no riding like the riding when she's gone.

Typical Friday, messages and posts... What 'er ya doin'?  Did you hear about X ride? etc

I wanted to say yes to all of 'em, being all pent up with my self-imposed, weakly regulated offthebike rest week.

I committed to meetin' the fellas by the harbor and heading up the coast to connect with the newly resurrected Food Park group ride.  Shamed PViddy into joining us - I'm not in shape - I know, that's why you should come - I'm gonna get dropped - I know, it'll be fun.

Our little posse met up with the group.

Lotsa good feelings, guys come from all parts to do the ride and we hadn't seen each other since it's summer demise - another topic.

Cheyne, how far you going?

Gonna do a hundy.

So, of course I thought I'd do the same.

We peeled off from the group.  Then went our separate ways.

I stopped for an apple danish at Hidden House, ran into Dylan and Mike and Alessandro.

65 miles in, 35 to go. What's a bachelor to do?

Then tragedy struck at mile 90.

Ugh.

Sliced sidewall.

I popped off my Mini-RaceDay bag, ready for a quick fix.

Oooops!

No nozzle for my cartridge... I then remembered I'd loaned it to a buddy on a ride and forgotten to repo it.  Rats!

Luckily, I have a million friends - fact - who ride.

Called one... I moved.

Called two... no answer.

Called three... I'm out, but wife is home.

Phew.  

Two blocks in my socks.

Got 'er fixed, and shot straight for the local, quirky bakery for an unpronouncable sandwich.

Lesson of the day:  be sure the vastly superior Mini RaceDay bag is loaded.

Click the image for details - I dare you... not really, but it's cool.   Check it out . 

https://pedalindustries.com/products/the-mini-raceday-bag

 _____

165 lbs
0 pullups/0 pushups
6.5 hrs sleep
6 hour ride.

Ride with us: click for info. 

MY STOMACH HURT, 'couldn't stop laughing.

It all started with Uncle Todd, I signed up for a triathlon.

When?

Sunday.

Well, awesome... let's get you hooked up.

It's hard to remember how incredibly foreign a bike can be.  We all rode bikes as kids... but, you pick up a pro-level bike for the first time and it might as well be a NASA spec'd interplanetary rover.

This is a very smart, hard working young man.

Clueless.

Have you ridden it?

Yeah, Uncle Todd.  I have a lot more respect for road bikers.  (just wait, kiddo)

K, how about the gears... do you understand how to shift?

Not really.

So we throw it in the bike stand and play around with the shifting.

Small in back, hard.  Small in front, easy.  

He nods.  I have complete faith by the end of 25 miles he'll have it dialed, but oh man... those first 10 are gonna be rough.

Let's get you in a kit.

The nut crunchers?

You'll be fine... now Wyatt, this is my prized speed suit.  We sell these for over $200.

Oh, okay I don't need that.

Yes you do... I'm telling you that so you have confidence that this is the very best money can buy... now go put it on.

Ok.

No undies, go commando.

He changes... comes out... now, in all fairness he is an outstanding surfer and wetsuits have the zipper in the back... he comes out with... you guessed it... THE ZIPPER IN BACK! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

I'm dying.

He starts laughing, can't help it.

What?!

Hahahaha.....hahahaha...

Bro.... hahaha.... it's .... on..... BACKWARDS!!!!

Back in the bathroom, and out.

You look great.  How's it feel.

Amazing.  When do I put it on?

First thing, under your wetsuit.  Then on the bike...

... do I run in it?

Absolutely?

For real?

Yes, my buddy Joby just PR'd Kona in that exact speed suit.

He smiles.

Me too... can't wait to go watch him Sunday.

I wore that very suit to a number of surprising road victories this year.  If you want to check it out here's the link:

https://pedalindustries.com/products/splatter-speed-suit-master-yellow

 _____

165.4 lbs
20 pullups/60 pushups
7.5 hrs sleep
1.25 hour ride.

Ride with us: click for info.